Department of Filk: The Literary Mack the Knife

Okay, dipping once again into the Filk file for a bit of literary silliness.  Swing it, Satchmo!

The Literary Mack the Knife

(tune:  "Mack the Knife" (of course!))

Oh the Shark has

Pretty teeth, dear

And he shows them

Pearly white,

You won't meet him

In the bookstore

But you might meet

Mack the Knife

When the shark bites

With his teeth, dear

Scarlet billows

'Gin to spread;

MacHeath’s lethal

Like the shark, dear,

But he's also

Quite well-read

By the shores of

Gitchee-Gumi,

Hiawatha

Used to go;

Now Nikomis

Sits there weeping;

Mack please say it

Isn't so...

Once upon a

Midnight dreary,

Weak and weary,

Pondered I;

Is that tapping

Just a raven

Or is Mackie

Stopping by...?

Mistress Em'ly

Belle of Amherst

Once sat writing

After tea;

"Since I could not

Stop for Death, dear,

Mack, he kindly

Stopped for me..."

It was Brillig,

Slithy Toves did

Gyre and Gimble

In the Wabe

Vorpal Mack went

Snicker-snack, dear

Jabberwock lay

There outgabe...

Captain Ahab,

That fanatic

Sought to kill that

Monster whale;

But who really

Sank the Pequod?

Mack says "Call me

Ishmael..."

Once an Old Man

Caught a “Beeg Feesh”

As he struggled

‘Gainst the Sea;

When the sharks bit,

With their teeth, dear,

Mack said “Leave a

Bite for me!”

Rev'rend Dimsdale,

Sinning Hester,

Justice Pynchon

Sweet Goodman Brown

Mister Hawthorne

Set them up, dear,

But our Mackie,

Mowed 'em down.

Our great authors

Wrote us stories

Full of death as

Well as life;

Don’t be napping

While in Lit Class

Or you might miss

Mack the Knife!